30 Ways Of Dealing With Fear
- Relax your body. Do whatever it takes to accomplish that; a hot bath, a walk, the right music, a book which will lift your spirits, calming tea. If you know anyone who can give you a Reiki session, this will help enormously.
- Begin a series of deep breaths. Feel your body’s relaxation response. Go into a meditative state. Fill yourself with light. Ask for a higher point of view. Ask your Higher Self for the help you need. Ask for grace.
- Consciously bring back to yourself all the energy that you have scattered elsewhere. Bring back the power you have given to others in certain areas of your life. Think of bringing in your maleness regardless of your sex. Make loud outbreath sounds, huh, huh, huh, while stamping your feet like a Maori warrior before battle! This is very, very effective.
- Let go of any particular solutions you are clinging to in your mind, especially if you are convinced that the only solutions are ones you don’t want. Open to other possibilities unknown to you without trying to figure out what they might be. Trust in spirit, not in externals for your safety.
- Move into a different physical position or get physically active.
- Make loud sharp sounds to break up the fear cloud around you. Intuitively you will know exactly what sounds to make. Have the intention of setting yourself free. This can be very effective, especially if you have a private place such as your car to do it. Breathe deeply. Do this whenever you are “in your stuff.”
- Call a friend to be with you or talk with you on the phone.
- Take a shower and consciously imagine it as a clearing process. For example, you may have caught yourself obsessing fearfully about your financial future. Brush your hair vigorously to help clear your aura, then take a shower and wash your hair. Think of the water as clearing unwanted thoughts from your energy field. Replace them with light and with your positive affirmations.
- Let somebody’s humor make you laugh. See if you can imagine the situation you’ve been in as a comedy without discounting yourself. Consider renting a humorous video.
- Give yourself an experience of pleasure.
- Get into the present moment, the power of the Now. Move out of dwelling on the past (“If only…”) or future (“What if.)”
- Imagine any emotional cords from other people which are attached to your chakras as being gently released and floating away. This will help you feel much lighter and will clear your aura of any fears which do not belong to you. It is very easy to pick up other peoples’ fears without realizing it as long as you carry any fear of your own to which it can attach. Remember nothing can attach to you that has no corresponding resonance within you.
- Consciously shift into self-nurturing, caring for your inner child self. This will result in a change of body position, breathing and thinking patterns. Give yourself extra loving care and nurturing no matter what you do.
- It is possible to shift your fear into excitement. They are two sides of the same coin so to speak. Imagine a great pot of water that is slowly getting warmer and warmer. The bubbles are rising. More and more of them are coming up to the surface. Finally the water boils. What are you feeling now?
- Get more information. In almost any situation of fear, obtaining more information is helpful.
- Create a detailed fantasy of a positive outcome. Review it in a meditative frame of mind each day.Accepting/Observing
- The other option, the one that is different from trying to avoid or shift a feeling is to accept your feelings and ride them. Let them flow through you like the wind. Thank them for what they are teachig you. Be a detached observer. Send love to your fears.Do not resist or try to actively change them. A natural shift will occur when you cease to struggle.
Then move into your creativity. Make a picture or music or poem or write your feelings in a journal. Let your creative energy flow. Let every voice within you be expressed from the fearful to the helpful.
- Ask for help in dreams. Write them down and work with them. Assume that everything in your dream is a part of you, even if disguised. Be each part. Have each part say how it feels and what it wants. Let them talk with each other honestly. A solution can usually be found in which every part gets what it truly wants. For a detailed description of how to do this see the Dreamwork Dialogue, A Manual for Dreamers and Guides.
- Avoid any form of self-criticism for outcomes of your risks or experiences. You are not to be abused inside for what you are learning.
- Separate the layers of feelings so you know if you are feeling more than one emotion, for example, fear of fear; guilt or anger about feeling fear. Identify the layers and name the feelings so you know exactly what you are dealing with. This dissolves a lot of the struggle immediately.
- Examine the beliefs that led you to the scare. Create the affirmations needed to change them. Use the affirmations to keep your life focused on what you want, not on what you don’t want.
- Imagine that you created this situation deliberately. What do you have to gain or learn from it? What is the lesson?
How can it be viewed as a positive happening?
- Be willing to give up any attachment to being seen as a victim. Be willing to give up being stroked (given sympathy or extra attention) for being a victim or using victimhood as an excuse for sorry-for-yourself feelings, actions or avoidances. This can be a major change.Be willing to give up seeing others as victims. You can still decide to help whoever you want to without using a one-up position. Set the boundaries you want around your personal time/space. Learn to firmly say “no, I don’t choose to” as needed, without defensiveness (victim story) or explanations.
- Allow yourself to risk and feel OK about that. Decide not to let fear alone be the basis of any decision, whether to do something or not do something.
- Give yourself any needed permissions you did not get from important authority figures in childhood. For a healthy, happy life you need internal permission to exist, to act, to honor your feelings, to think for yourself, to feel sexy, to be the sex you are, to make mistakes, to be a success (and feel good about it), to take time and space for yourself, to ask for help, and so on, whatever your inner child needs to hear.
- Write a dialogue among all the parts of yourself with thoughts and feelings about this fearful situation. Include your Higher Self. Ask every internal part to say what it feels and wants. Continue the dialogue among the parts until all have agreed on what they want.This will happen more easily than you may expect. There is wisdom in every part of you, even the ones you have thought were obstructive. They are simply trying to bring your attention to something important, some aspect of your greater self. You will feel the relief of clarity.
You do not have any internal enemies, only portions of the self which may be obeying outdated instructions or holding to distorted perceptions/beliefs from long ago.
- Imagine being what you most fear, the person, the energy or a symbol of the power you have given away. Feel yourself restored to a sense of power by reintegrating this powerful energy, this part of yourself. This is most easily done in dreamwork, by being all the parts in the dream.
- Write down three pages of stream of consciousness about how you feel first thing in the morning. Use handwriting, not your computer. Write until it is all on paper. See Julia Cameron’s wonderful book, The Artist’s Way, for a complete description of how effectively this can work for you. It is best done first thing in the morning but can be effective at any time when you need to express feelings.
- Recall a moment in the past when you felt very powerful and happy. Enhance that. Get fully into it. Then allow that power and happiness to give you a new perspective on your current situation.
- Review your past successes and achievements. List them and give yourself lots of credit and love for what you have done.
Authors Details: Toraya AKA Carly Ayres <[email protected]>